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Ritual Ancestral Reconnection

This ritual is designed especially for individuals who are hoping to start an ancestor veneration practice for the first time, or who have not honored their ancestors in a long time. It is designed to invite your ancestors to draw near to you.

Before performing this ritual, you may wish to put together a list of the names of your ancestors going back as far as you remember. This list should include your direct ancestors—that is, your biological mother and father, and their biological mothers and fathers, and so on. You may also include other ancestors, including anyone who nurtured you for a significant length of time, especially when you were a child.

Obtain a white candle. This can be any kind of candle: a glass- encased seven-day candle from a grocery store, a Shabbat candle, a tea light. It can even be scented or electric, if that’s what you have on hand! Along with the candle, get a nice loaf of unsliced bread and a bottle of either wine or spring water, depending on what you like to drink.

Fast for at least an hour. Then, take your candle to a quiet place in your home. The kitchen or the dining room are ideal, and if you need to wait until the evening for the bustle of day to calm down in those areas, it will be worth it. If you have family or roommates who are also interested in ancestor veneration, you can invite them to come with you

Take a moment to breathe. Then, light your candle and say:

Through the love of the first Mother and the first Father, I remember my ancestors. I remember them in joy and sorrow. I remember that this air is the air they breathed, that this bread is the bread they ate, that this wine / water is the wine / water they drank.

Now, if you feel comfortable doing so, you can read the list of names that you have prepared. After you recite each name, say a short prayer for their soul. There are several of these out there; for example:

May [they] rest in peace —OR— Peace be upon [them]

Take the bread and hold it in your hands. Pray for nourishment:

We pray that we will always have the resources we need so that our body can handle the work we are called to do.

Now, rip off a small piece and put it on a plate before the candle. Don’t use a knife; this isn’t the time for weapons. Rip off pieces for anyone who is joining you and one for yourself. Now, take the water or the wine. Pray for inspiration:

We pray for clear words, clear vision, and clear purpose.

Pour it in a glass and leave it before the candle along with the piece of bread. Serve some of the drink to anyone who is joining you, and to yourself. You can drink out of individual cups, or a shared cup, or even pass the bottle around, depending on what kind of a mood you’re in.

Relax and enjoy the gentle glow of the candle. Some people see shapes when they gaze at a candle for a long period of time. Perhaps you will see something in the flame or the melted wax, or perhaps a strange thought will occur to you unlike any you have had before. Whatever you see or feel is appropriate. Write it in your journal or share it with your companions.

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